As a kid, I fantasized about what my life as an adult would be like. At the time, my dreams seemed big enough for me, but I know now, they weren’t nearly as big as they should have been.

Large oak and pine trees outnumbered the population of my small community. Traffic lights, bodegas, and screaming sounds of emergency vehicles were substituted by narrow dirt roads, crickets, singing birds, and other insects in the night.

The summers in Weymouth were hot as hell, but I survived life, even without the cool breeze of electric-powered air.  Although I did not know how to swim, I dreamt of an oversized inground pool in the backyard on our five-acre lot. The fabulous pool water would have been so refreshing on the blazing summer days, but my parents said they weren’t rich. So I thought only wealthy families owned pools.

Electric heat kept our home toasty during the brutally winter, but I had images of a brick fireplace blazing with crackling firewood in our family room. I am sure I was a pain in the ass because I also nagged my parents about adding a fireplace to our ranch.

I knew I wanted more out of my life, but I lacked the vision of getting there. My parents taught me to sacrifice and work hard, so that’s what I did. My journey started at age 17, when in 1984, I opened the now-defunct Trump Plaza Hotel & Casino in Atlantic City, NJ.  

In 1993 my husband and I purchased our first home, and I got my first wood-burning fireplace!! I was excited!  Five years later, our second home had two fireplaces, an inground swimming pool, and a jacuzzi.  We thought we’d never leave that home, but seven years later, we built our dream home, which had a gas-burning fireplace in our master suite and a wood-burning fireplace in the family room.  Best of all, the backyard was resort-like with the most beautiful heated inground pool. I couldn’t have dreamt up a more lovely home. 

By no means am I bragging about my accomplishments.  Instead I am demonstrating the importance of goal setting and working toward something bigger.

While I am grateful to have had the fireplaces and pools, as I grew older, I understood their more significant meanings.  The memories created amongst my family and friends, chatting around the burning fireplaces and laughing in the pools on hot summer days, will last forever. Family and friendships bonded forever. 

Today I live over 800 miles from my childhood home, but whenever I visit South Jersey, I drive by my family’s home.  On my last visit, I stopped in front of the house and took pictures. Fifty years of memories fill this home. Visiting keeps me humble, and it is a reminder to never give up on accomplishing my goals.

Please encourage your children and the youth in your circle to use their imagination to conjure up the most extreme and unimaginable dreams possible. And once they fulfill those dreams, to create new ones!. While you are at it, tap into your imagination and create some dreams of your own. 

Although my childhood fantasies were about acquiring tangible objects, yours may be about traveling, changing careers, lifestyle changes, or something else. Also, be reminded that age does not limit your aspirations.

What were some of your childhood dreams?

Leslie Jones, Viola Davis, Vera Wang, Toni Morrison, Tracee Ellis Ross, Kerri Washington, and Angela Bassett are a few women who, later in their lives, slammed home runs on their dreams.

Thirty-nine years later, I’ve traveled to countries that I didn't know existed as a child, eaten exotic food, and the best surprise and gift to myself was becoming a wellness entrepreneur.

Because of the pandemic, the past two years have been freakish; however, 2022 is less than 30 days away.  I encourage you to take some time before the year ends and give yourself the gift of revisiting or thinking about your dreams for the new year.  

Personal growth is essential to your well-being. Rather than floating through life and working through whatever comes along, making time for your dreams is a better path to happiness. Setting and achieving goals is self-affirming and improves self-confidence. Not sure where you should focus? Try this recommended exercise I adapted from John W. Travis and Regina Sara Ryan's Wellness Workbook.Take for blank sheets of paper.

1. On the first, you write, “Where/How I want My life to Be Five Years from Today?”

2. On the next, write, “Where/How I Want My Life to Be Two Years from Today?”

3. On the third, write, Where/How I Want My Life to Be Six Months from Today?”

4. On the forth, write, “How would I Spend the Next Months of My Life If I Knew For Sure They Would Be My Last?”

Give yourself 15-20 minutes to complete each sheet. Start with the five-year projection; first, complete them in the order above. As you complete each page, turn the sheet over and complete the next sheet without looking at the previous page.Once you have completed all of the pages, recall that wellness is an integration of body, mind, and spirit. Look at your responses. Do you see these components written in your responses? If you did not write anything about your state of physical health, your lifestyle habits, or your desires for enhanced emotional well-being, take a few more minutes to add them.

When you finish, read over your notes, and look for repeated patterns or anything you feel strongly about. As you read your writing, pay attention to your internal voice. Is the self-talk positive or negative? Don't allow any negative self-talk to defeat you before you've even begun. Set the exercise down and do it again in a few days.

Analyze your results and ask yourself, "What would I have/do/be if I had no limitation (like time, money, kids, a spouse). We often set limiting beliefs about what we can or cannot accomplish. Your mission is to push past the limiting thinking and focus on a compelling goal. Begin to write a blue print of action steps to start you on your journey. Trying writing SMART goals. SMART stands for:

S – Specific (or Significant).
M – Measurable (or Meaningful).
A – Attainable (or Action-Oriented).
R – Relevant (or Rewarding).
T – Time-bound (or Trackable).

Keep your blueprint in a visible place. I have a habit of writing action steps on my bathroom mirror, reading the daily list, and crossing items off the lists to help keep me focused and motivated. Share your goals with one or two people who inspire and encourage you. They should be individuals who have earned your trust. Take your time and enjoy your journey!

 If you would like assistance to set and work toward your goals in 2022, schedule a complimentary discovery call here.

Be well!